Even At My Worst I'm Best With You

There are so many levels of relationships that we have with people.  We have family, friends, coworkers, classmates, best friends, acquaintances, husbands, wives, children, etc.  We allow each of them to get to know us to a certain level.  If we are lucky, we have a friend (or two, or three) who know us completely.  If we have them, we are truly blessed.  I know, because I have three such friends myself. 

Don't make the mistake of thinking that we are all the same. The four of us range in age from 44 down to 27. Some of us are married, one is not. Some of us have children, one does not. My children are teenagers, the others have younger children. We all met at work, but only two of us still work at the same job. We are at different stages in our lives, going through different things at the moment. Yet I've never been closer to another person as I am with them.

The four of us get together a few times a year.  It doesn't matter what we do when we are together, the important thing is that we are together.  The last time we got together, we had dinner and one of us commented early on how it had been awhile since we were all together but that we all just seemed to pick up our conversation of our lives right where we left off last time.  We fell into a comfortable togetherness as if there had been no time at all between that night and our last evening together.  It's was like we had never been apart, even though it had been several months. 

These three friends know me better than anyone else on earth.  They know all the good, bad and ugly about me.  They know my strengths and weaknesses.  They know my sins and my triumphs.  They know my fears and my hopes.  They know my personality, my stupidity, my silliness, my sense of humor, and my downfalls.  And they still accept me and love me!

When we are together, I can completely relax.  I can completely be myself.  I can do or say anything without fear of ridicule or judgement.  Ok, that's not entirely true, there's potential for plenty of ridicule, but it would be all in fun.  We have supported each other over the last several years through so many of life's ups and downs.  Cried together and laughed together.  I have sought them out to just talk about stuff so many times when I was going through something.  I joke that they should send me a psychologist's bill, but it's entirely true.  I don't know where I would be without their support and acceptance and laughter and comfort and advice.

My life is far from perfect, but I am extremely blessed with these friends.  I love you Patty, Bailey & Amber! 


 

Where Are You Now?

To my favorite teacher, told me never give up
To my 5th grade crush, who I thought I really loved
To the guys I miss, and the girls we kissed
Where are you now?

To my ex best friend, don't know how we grew apart
To my favorite band, and sing alongs in my car
To the face I see, in my memories
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cuz I'm thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn't for you I would never be who I am

To my first girlfriend, I thought for sure was the one
To my last girlfriend, sorry that I screwed it up
To the ones I loved and didn't show it enough
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cuz I'm thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn't for you I would never be who I am

I know I'll never see those days again
And things will never be that way again
But that's just how it goes
People change, but I know
I won't forget you

To the ones who cared and who were there from the start
To the love that left, and took a piece of my heart
To the few who'd swear, I'd never go anywhere
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Cuz I'm thinking of you
You showed me how
How to live like I do
If it wasn't for you I would never be who I am

If it wasn't for you I would never be who I am
If it wasn't for you I'd be nothing
Where are you now?


These are the lyrics to a song from 2009 by the group Honor Society. Pretty amazing lyrics if you think about it and apply them to your own life. Think about all the people who have touched your life in some way--however small--and have affected who you are today. Teachers, coaches, family members, friends, crushes, coworkers, boy/girlfriends, favorite musicians, internet friends, athletes we like, people you are waiting in line with even. They all affect our lives and help to shape who we are. Mostly for the good, but sometimes in a negative way as well. We can't help but be affected by their touch on our lives.

Teachers or coaches who believed in you (or didn't) have a big affect on you. You'll probably never see most of your teachers/professors/coaches again but I'll bet that there is at least one who had an affect on your life. And maybe not because of something they taught you in class. Friends, especially the ones we make in high school or college, have a strong affect on the person we become. This is a huge one. During those eight years we are figuring out who we are and what we stand for and who we are going to be. All of these people help shape who we are for sure. It's so easy to lose touch with these friends after graduation and when life gets busy and gets in the way. But that doesn't mean that you don't think about them and wonder what they're doing and hope that they're ok.

I've kept in touch with a couple of friends, but for the most part I've lost touch with most people who were in my life 20 years ago. In the past couple of years, through Facebook, I have reconnected with a few friends from school who were important in my youth. Oh, make no mistake, I've reconnected with lots of old classmates, but there are a select few who stand out. Who had an impact on my life. Whom I have thought about over the years and always wondered what they're doing and if they're ok. It was only recently, while reconnecting with these special few friends, that I realized what an impact they had on my life and future friendships/relationships. Each of these people affected my life and probably none of them realize to what extent.

Each person in our past is part of a memory. Mostly good. Some bad. All memorable. We carry those memories and those people around with us every day. When we see them or talk with them, the memories--and the feelings surrounding them--resurface. Don't think for a second that you are not part of someone's memories. You are. And for that reason, we all must remember how profoundly we affect each others lives every day.